Before learning how to be a great girlfriend kindly read below.
Disclaimer: every man is not your man, these tips are supposed to be used only on YOUR MAN ….men who have shown and proved to be worthy of your love. Please do not treat regular casual sex boys as husband material ‘they do not deserve it and will not appreciate your efforts these men do not see you as a girlfriend let alone a ‘great girlfriend.’
1 – Be respectful
I have mentioned in previous posts the importance of being respectful when you are dealing with your man in my speak only to the king in him.
Now that being said if you are in a relationship then I agree that love and respect go both ways however to be a great girlfriend you must know what your man needs in order for him to feel important and secure. So don’t emasculate him by calling him stupid or dimming down his ideas.
Even if you do not agree with something he is doing or saying approach him like a lady, stay within your feminine energy ‘as that is what you own’ and let him politely know your thoughts. Always ‘kill them with kindness’ as the saying goes. Understand what makes your man tick and by belittling him too friends or in front of people will not make him want to be with you ‘even if its in jest.’ Always compliment him in front of others and support his efforts. Never swear or call him names in an argument as there are some things that are very hard to take back.
There is nothing worse than being with a partner that does not show you support.
We all need that one person in life who we can depend on to give us an extra push towards our dreams especially when times are rough and nothing seems to fall in to place. Times like these reveal the real from the fakes.
And trust me no one wants to be dating a hater. As the saying goes ‘treat others how now you want to be treated.’ If you want your man to be supportive and treat you as a great girlfriend then you too must show him support. If your man wants to change career and leave his faithful 9 to 5 job to become a football agent then be his biggest cheerleader.
Let him know that you are by his side and believe in his abilities, give him confidence and at the same time be wise. If you know that by him leaving his job his rent or mortgage may suffer then perhaps suggest that he pursues his dream on a part time basis until it brings in enough revenue to be a full time business.
Whatever the case may be ‘never be a dream killer’ if you have worries or doubts about your man’s abilities to succeed then maybe you are with the wrong person. Stay positive and proud of whom you have by showing kindness and keeping the peace and harmony.
2 – Stay feminine:
Remember that you are his lady first and foremost and that it is the female energy that you bring to the table. Just because we had a feminist movement and wanted equal working rights for women that does not make us men. Just as we bring value to the workplace in a different way than men do we still also bring much value to our personal relationships.
Nurture your man, cuddle and massage him and run his bath, ask him if he has eaten and if not then be sure to prepare a nice plate of food for him. When your man gets home from work allow him to vent out his shift to you if necessary and be supportive, don’t nag or moan.
Make sure that the home is clean, smells fresh and that you look your best. Just because you’re at home does not give you the excuse to always lay around in your head scarf and tracksuit bottoms. If you want him to think of only you then you must remind him daily of the reasons why. So put on something nice and make sure you look presentable.
3 – Listen to him
We all want to be heard and at times we as women can demand to be the center of attention and without even realizing it our passion and high energy can often take over a whole conversation.
And although your love for the cause may have been part of his initial attraction to you when you are in a relationship you must remember that there are two of you involved. We were blessed with 2 ears and 1 mouth so that we can listen more than we speak and I do not mean ‘listen just to answer’ in other words don’t sit quietly thinking about how you will respond to what your man is saying instead hear him out, smile and take in deeply what he is telling you.
Who knows you might just learn something. Men want to be heard too, just as much as women in fact it just so happens that they are a bit more introvert with their feelings than we are so if your man wants to talk then see it as a magic moment and pay close attention.
4 – Be nice to his family / friends
Now unless you have the mother in law to be from hell or your mans friends are right losers then this is a very important step that needs to be adhered to if you want to be a great girlfriend. Before your man met you he had another special woman in his life, the one that gave him life and raised him ‘his mum’ alongside his mother were his support system ‘his friends’ and believe me when I say that these two groups of people hold a special place in his heart.
Generally speaking a man depends on his mum and his friends for nurture, guidance, advice and support. Their opinions usually count for quite a lot especially at the beginning of his relationship so make sure you are beautiful on the inside if you are wanting to impress.
Some mums can feel as though they may lose their baby boy when he ventures out in to the dating arena as do can the friends if they see their boy falling hard for some woman. It is your job to make them love you so that they cannot help but tell your man why he should be with you and only you.
As stated previously their opinion counts so make it a good one. That being said I do understand that there are some mothers who are hard to impossible to please but do try your best and at least it shows your man that you are not petty, but that you are naturally kind and patient. Two great girlfriend traits!
5 – Don’t make him jealous
All to often it seems women are determined to make their man feel jealous and insecure by going out of their way to mention how many guys attempted to talk to them that afternoon or by simply flirting with random men in front of their partner. Now some may argue that by displaying this behaviour it will make your man want you more as he will know that you are in demand but trust me the opposite is true. Your man already knows that you are in demand that is why he is with you as in his eyes you are the greatest catch out here ‘ and if that’s not the case then you are with the wrong man.’
By trying to make your man jealous two things can happen. 1- He will think that you are not really interested in being with him so he will begin looking for other options elsewhere or 2- he will get angry and end up paranoid every time you leave the house, thus causing friction and animosity in the relationship or 3- god forbid things could even get physical and you may get hurt.
If you are experiencing a distance in your relationship then ask yourself why instead of automatically trying to game play.
Approach the situation like an adult and ask your man outright what the issue is, maybe you will find that you just had your wires crossed or that a little more spice was needed to turn him on. Either way show him that you are a great girlfriend by shwing that you care about his needs.
6 – Give him sex
If you haven’t already then make sure you read my 10 tips on how to turn your man on then please go over to the post and familiarize yourself with some of the amazing tips shared. It’s a no brainer that sex usually plays a big part in a relationship unless of course there are difficulties in terms of health and ability to take part in such exercise, and that being said if you are able you should also be willing.
Men are visual, physical beings and it is their natural instinct and part of their Masculine energy to pursue and seek sexual relations. Your man is no different at a basic level so he too will require a release of sexual energy often. How often depends on what you both decide is appropriate but I believe that the passion that creates a sexual encounter between two loving people in a relationship can keep the intimacy and love alive.
Sex should be a spiritual connection where your souls intertwine and 2 become 1 so don’t ever take it for granted. Such a powerful experience should only be shared with someone who values and loves you deeply as once that moment is lost you will never get it back. So if you are in a committed to being the great girlfriend that you know you can and should be and you are in a heartfelt relationship then you and your man deserve to be having great sex and often.
‘If you are struggling with creating new habits in your life or suffer from low self esteem check out my books for more advice and guidance to help you prosper in both of these areas.’